by Tamara Glasner

There are many sounds that come from a home. Sounds of laughter and love. Sounds of joy and peace. Sounds of closeness and trust. Or, alternately, sounds of strife, anger, and hurt. Though you may not know it, you have the power to control what sort of music comes out of your house. And it is as simple as choosing whether to be thankful or not. 

Sharp tones are softened by thankfulness. A thankful heart does not express meanness, criticism, or harshness.

A thankful heart sounds like peace, acceptance, love, and kindness. 

Who wants to live in a home where the tone is peaceful, accepting, loving, and kind? Where you are not constantly attacked without warning. 

I certainly do! And miraculously, living in such a home is 100% possible, if you cultivate a thankful heart.

Steps to thankfulness: 

• Mindfully trade criticism and quick comebacks for appreciation.
• Refrain from nitpicking.
• Remind yourself what you are thankful for daily.
• Catch yourself when you start to get annoyed with your family and laugh it off. We all have habits that may grate on those we live with. Showing grace and generosity towards our weaknesses and quirks is an open door to enjoying life together.
• Practice saying nice, encouraging words to everyone in your house, several times a day.
• Don’t take over, fix, or impose your ideas of what’s right or how to do things. Let the people in your home be free to create and express themselves the way God made them. (I.e., don’t control others.)
• Train your mind to be thankful above and beyond any other response. 

Lawrence and I have had lots of practice breaking free from destructive patterns of complaining and criticising each other. Little jabs, judgemental looks, and know-it-all postures quickly erode trust and are a sure fire way of having a terrible home life. 

We all are in our homes a lot more now. We are around each other a lot more than we have been used to in the past. If there was ever a time to change the tone of your home, this is it. 

Don’t be afraid to stop the voice that is bringing everyone down. Take it seriously and communicate that criticism and complaining is no longer going to be acceptable at your home. 

Take it from me, filtering your thoughts and words through LOVE will literally deepen your love and affection for your spouse or those you live with, and make the sounds coming out of your walls ones you want to listen to.